“Trust in him at all times, you people; pour out your hearts before him. God is our refuge.”
The death of a marriage through divorce brings an onslaught of new and different challenges — some small and some big — but none I ever planned to encounter.
After 19 years, my life's timeline was marked by where welived and what we did. Even the seemingly small change from “we” to “me” was complicated. And though God has done exceedingly and abundantly more than I could ever ask for or imagine (Ephesians 3:20), sometimes my heart is just heavy.
I was content to be single for the rest of my days, enjoying the freedom of an undivided devotion to my Lord (1 Corinthians 7:35). But it didn’t take long to recognize that my heart longed for a life-giving union. Still, that meant I had to do what felt like the scariest proposition of my life … I had to date again! There are moments when I feel like I’m wasting all my time and other moments when I can taste hope, only to be disappointed.
But as I sat with my feelings, I questioned if I had the right to feel this heavy. After all, I have friends who are still waiting to experience marriage and others who know the pain of widowhood. Yet the Lord still invited me to bring every concern of my heart to Him, as the psalmist encourages us:
“Trust in him at all times, you people; pour out your hearts before him. God is our refuge” (Psalm 62:8).
In moments of disappointment and grief, God was inviting me to pour out my heart and speak the unfiltered truth of my feelings. I didn’t need to compare my challenges to someone else’s to decide whether they were worth praying about. God was delighted to meet me in my prayer spot as I put my face to the ground and laid out my tearful lament before my only refuge. I had to wrestle through the muddy waters of my weary soul until the peace from God’s unwavering love and protection calmed my heart. I will strive to wait patiently with my hope in His hands until He brings me into my next chapter.
Sister, maybe you, too, are in a chapter of your life that feels uncertain and uncomfortable. You feel whiplashed going from peak to valley in a single breath, yet you wonder if your problems are too insignificant. Maybe you think you should just snap out of it because it’s not that hard.
Don’t let comparison rob you of an encounter with the Lord. I encourage you to speak the pain of your heart to the Lord, no matter how big or small your pain seems. He can handle your unfiltered truth and your doubts. More than that, He wants to remind you that He is the safe refuge for all the concerns your heart carries.
Prayer Starter
Father, we proclaim Your goodness and faithfulness, even in the midst of our valleys. Help us do the vulnerable work of placing our hearts into Your loving hands. Our hope is only in You. In Jesus’ name, amen.
Digging Deeper
Hebrews 4:16, “Therefore, let us approach the throne of grace with boldness, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in time of need” (CSB).
Psalm 34:17-18, “The righteous cry out, and the LORD hears, and rescues them from all their troubles. The LORD is near the brokenhearted; he saves those crushed in spirit” (CSB).
Reflect
Is there an area of your life that you’ve considered too insignificant to bother the Lord with instead of honestly bringing your heart to Him? Whether you pray out loud or journal your prayers, will you commit to speaking your unfiltered and unjudged truth to Him today?
What’s one small thing you can do to choose hope today?
We’d love to hear from you! Share your thoughts in the comments.
